207 Days Until my 40th Birthday

Yes, it is only 207 days until I hit that number and I am sure feeling the pressure. I want to feel like I use to so I know I have to do this. I am still taking the Alli and I know I will have to buy more soon but I'm not sure I will be able to until we get our taxes done.

Another thing I am not sure about is being able to get online to blog as much. I have to let my home phone and internet go. The bill is due tomorrow and I just don't see being able to pay it before they decide to cut me off. It won't be the first time I will be without internet. All I have is this dial up and I really hate it.

When we get our taxes done, I want to go to Cricket and get that deal they have on the modem you plug in to a USB port. I have checked and they do cover our area. Basically it will be the same price, right at 40 plus tax. I think the home phone with dial up is like 38 or 39 dollars but Cricket will be faster. So unless I can get to the public library or go to my brothers house, I won't be blogging on here as much.

Before I switch and am without Internet at home, I hope that divulging so much personal information won't hurt me or my family. I worry about letting anyone who comes across my blog, facebook page, or myspace page getting personal information. Maybe I am being paranoid or just plain stupid, but I do realize that strangers could read anything I wrote.

Complete and total strangers know things about me. So why would I put things on this blog? that is my question. Am I looking for attention? Am I looking for sympathy? I guess I need to ask that of anyone else who advertises who they are on these blogs too. I believe I am just looking for a place to express my views. I am just looking for a place to voice my opinions. I am just looking for a place to write.

So, thanks for reading this and I will be back when and if I get that modem from Cricket.

Why do I still feel hungry?

My major question is "Why do I still feel hungry?"

The Alli pills are helping but they don't curb my appetite. I was so hungry when I woke up this morning. I went to bed eating a small bowl of chicken noodles about 11 PM. I had to warm up some food for him when he came in from his job so that made me hungry.

I woke up this morning and still hungry - I ate 2 packages of instant oatmeal when I should only be eating 1. I went into work and at 8 I was hungry. I put if off as long as 9 AM. I got out my package of crackers and jar of peanut butter. Put together 4 peanut butter and crackers. It held me over until 11, then my stomach started rumbling again.

I had brought a Hungry Man's Dinner. HINT: Don't ever buy those. It is packed with 800 calories and 400 fat calories. It was real high in fat but the Alli did not affect me in the least. I thought it would but I have been side effect free all day.

About 3:30 I got hungry again so I ate more peanut butter and crackers. I don't know if the fact that I was sick and had diarrhea bad for 2 days did something to my body or not. I haven't taken my water pills the past couple of days and I try to drink my water but that gremlin in my stomach tells my brain to eat.

I know I need to keep taking the pills so I will but my stomach talking to me while I am trying to work is not a good thing. I had some left over fat free hard candy's that I bought from the Dollar General Store at Christmas time which gave my mouth something to do when I wasn't talking on the phone. And something else that isn't helping is the Valentine Candy. I swore off chocolate but somebody put a few pieces in my mailbox at work so I succumb to the pressure and at a tiny square of of a chocolate chewy candy bar. It tasted so good but I felt so guilty. The temptation to eat chocolate during holidays is not fair especially on this holiday.

I would be posting a picture because I got a new phone with a camera but I got to get one of those little storage thingy besides the Sim card. When I get it I will probably become a picture taking fool and my son can put me some good music on it. It is a Sony Ericsson Walkman. I wanted a slider but this will do - It was free with the upgrade.

Well, thanks to my 6 followers now and feel free to comment on anything I write. I need the feedback. I am putting my life out in cyber land for anyone to read and I could get easily bored with this like myspace. (I don't think I have checked it in over a month now)

Some Things About Me You may Not Know

I have been reading other peoples blogs and there is usually one thing everyone blogs about - things you may or may not know about them. So I thought I might try my hand to give you an insight about who I am. Here it goes....

1. I was born in Illinois. Yup I'm a Yankee.

2. When I was 6 months old I rode a plane to Okinawa. My father was stationed over there so about the first 2 years of my life were spend overseas. (And I don't remember a thing but I got pictures) I have never been on an airplane since and I don't think I want to even want to ride one now.

3. My dad received a check from the military so he didn't work much. But I do remember traveling a lot. My brother was born in California and we lived everywhere in between there and Florida. We never lived in the Midwest like Utah or Nevada and we never lived in the northeast like New York or Ohio. So moving was something we did a lot until he finally settled on the little town of Sheridan, Arkansas. Even then, he had plans on going on south to Louisiana (boy am I glad we didn't - I hate hot and spice foods)

4. I learned to ride my first bike in Michigan. It's not easy riding a bike on snow.

5. We used to go swimming every summer at Cox Creek. We camped there and fished there. I had a lot of good times floating on my tire tube. I remember one summer they drained the lake. I went with my dad to walk around. Dead trees and trash mostly. There was this one part that still had water where people still went out to fish.

6. I learned to drive when I was 14 years old. When I drove my dads Cadillac to the revenue office to get my license, I almost hit the side of the brick building. When I was practicing, I was turning into the local Sonic and drove onto the grass in the front. Some boys in pick-up trucks where laughing at me. I starting laughing too. I blamed it on the semi that was on my tail. I was scared he was going to run over me.

7. I started smoking at age 19. I started with Virginia Slim 120s. I lived in Illinois. I was attending a two year college.

8. I married my ex at 19 also.

9. My one and only son, Brandon, was born right after I turned 21. I couldn't even go out a celebrate my 21st birthday. Legal to buy liquor but also 7 months pregnant.

10. I married my second husband at 23 and we have been married ever since.

11. My husband is 6, sometimes only 5 years older than me. What can I say, I like older men.

12. I never planned on having children but I wouldn't change a thing. My son is better than any college course I could ever have.

13. I never planned on getting married but when I found the right person I couldn't bare the thought of being alone.

14. I have been overweight most of my life. I blame it on the big folks in my family.

15. I lost 65 lbs when I was 17. I just made up my mind I wasn't going to be overweight any more. I set a goal and got down to 130 lbs.

16. My daddy also died when I was 17. He saw me lose the weight, graduate from high school, get a boyfriend and apply for college. The day he died I was in Monticello filling out applications and all that stuff you do to get enrolled as a freshman.

17. I have been at the same job with the state for the past 8 years going on 9 years this May.

18. I am a perfectionist but I put stuff off until the last minute.

19. I am a neat freak but hate to do laundry and do daily cleaning.

20. I love to take pictures.

21. I love to write stories.

22. I clip coupons but seldom use them because they are usually at home when I am at the store.

23. I don't think of myself as a smart person but people tell me I am.

24. I hated Spanish in college - 2 years of it. Never again.

25. I haven't had a chocolate candy bar or chocolate ice cream in 3 years.

26. I love reality TV. When the first episode of Road Rules came on TV in the 90's, my husband and I would watch it before anything else.

27. I love American Idol. Kelly Clarkson, Rueben Studdard, Carrie Underwood, Fantasia, Taylor Hicks, Jordan Sparks and David number 2. My prediction is a white female will win this season.

28. I have colored my hair ever since my mom would buy the hair color for me. So I don't know what my true hair color is.

29. I hate my moles.

30. Last but not least. I love my little 25 lbs, smooth coat, red dachshund. His name is Red. I got him when he was 6 months old. He is now 6 and a half. He has more gray hair than me. Yes, he is spoiled. I know it is a no-no but he sleeps with us. I want to have more little weenie dogs but I don't have the money to go buy a female.

And one more thing, the closest I have gotten to a boat is when my dad took me on his 16 foot fishing boat on Cox Creek. I have never been on a boat since.

Plan's for Valentines Day!

We have plan's for Valentines Day. We have my mother-in-laws van so have enough froom and just planned on taking Brandon and his girlfriend out to eat and to the movies but a friend of Eugene's from his last job came over with his wife. She recently broke her foot - that is a long story I can't go into but anyway, they are going to go out with us Saturday.

So I have to go to the gun show Saturday but after that we are going to go out to eat and to the movies. Eugene usually gets me a fruit basket or flowers sent to work but since things are tight we are just going to go out and have a good time. I don't know at this minute what movie to go see. It has been a long time since we went out. I think the last movie we went to see was "Are we there yet?" I would suggest bowling but she broke her foot so that is difinitely out of the question. I just hope they stay together and can work things out. A lot of couples have problems in there marriage but I hope they can make it work. Eugene and I have had lots of problems too but we always seem to work things out because I am always right and he is always wrong. lol

Well, I don't know what kind of Valentines Day you will have but I will be sure to blog about it. I sure to need a new camera so I can post some pictures. Blog later.

A Pretty Day

It is so nice outside. I would rather be outside but there is nothing to do so I am sitting at my computer doing this. I did go out and put rain-x on my car windows, my mother-in-laws van and my sisters van. I can't take a picture. I need a camera phone so I could, hopefully I can get a better phone soon. I have a motorola that I have had for two years now. My husband can't even keep his phone without breaking it, getting it wet or just plain destroying it for more than 6 months. Why are boy's and men so hard on there stuff? My son is excluded. I don't know why he has never been hard on his stuff but he doesn't break stuff like other boys.

I hope we can take my mother-in-laws van back next week end. We thought it was leaking transmission fluid but the guy who fixed it said it is not leaking. She spent a lot of money. The guy said he thinks it is leaking water around the head. I have no clue as what a head is on the motor but whatever.

I got a lot of things to do like get our taxes together. My brother and his wife came over earlier to talk. They just came back from Walmart. They are always going to Wally World. She had been taking Alli but the side effects have made her stop. She said she stopped because when he went to the doctor, she left a big greasy spot on that paper from her fart. She said she has to put towels on her furniture because it has really bothered her. So she stopped. It doesn't affect me like that. My sister has been taking them for a while also but Alli hasn't affect her either.

My brother is a real big fellow also. He said his insurance will pay for the lap band. My sister in law said Medicaid will pay for her to have the lap band. She has problems with her back and other things so she is a perfect canadite and so is he. My sister said she won't have the lap band because of the problems she has heard about others having. I know there are side effects and it may not be worth the trouble in the long run. We came from a big family. Lot's of big people in our family so I like to blame it on being hereditary.

So I guess my diet taking these Alli pills are working for me. I will post a picture soon. Bye for today.

DIET PROGRESS - TAKING THE ALLI PILL

There are 217 days left until my 40th birthday.

I have started taking the Alli pill. I have been taking them for two weeks now. My sister gave me a weeks worth then I am in the process of buying a starter pack from my sis-in-law. I gotta pay her on the 16th when I get paid. I think they are really helping. I still get hungry. They don't help with hunger pains but if I eat something I shouldn't it really lets me know.

I am also taking water pills to help with the swelling on my ankles after a long day of sitting behind a desk all day. Between the 2 I am doing good. I can tell a difference in my clothes. My sis-in-law has been taking them a long time but she hasn't been serious so she really hasn't lost any weight. My sister has been taking them for a couple of months and has lost 20 lbs. So there has to be something to this miracle little blue pill called ALLi.

I guess I will reap the benefits later. Yes, it does give you diarrhea if you eat the wrong thing. I found out just how bad it can be when I ate a small 99 cent bag of cheese puffs on the drive to Monticello last Saturday. I paid for it when I got to my mother-in-laws house. I didn't eat but half of the bag when my colon starting having a mind of its own.

One morning I ate some pancakes - don't ever eat pancakes with syrup! You will pay for it.

So I think I have found something to help me. I have tried so many diets. I tried the Atkins diet. Word of advice for women - DON'T DO ATKINS! You will go crazy! It messes with your emotions. The lack of carbs is hard on your body. Yes, you lose the weight but it will come back and with a vengeance. I lost 40 lbs and gained 80 lbs.

I have tried to just eat yogurt and cottage cheese - yuck! I loved yogurt and still do to a certain extent but I can't eat it like I did before.

I have tried to just buy those Weight Watcher and other diet frozen dinners. They don't work - you will be hungry and must eat something else with them.

I tried the gym. Yes, I was faithful. I went 3 days a week. Lost 40 lbs but you know what? It all came back plus more. Exercise is great but you can't quit. Now I can't find the energy to get my butt to the gym.

So I have done lots of different things and I think that taking this little blue pill that is very easy to swallow will be something I will have to keep taking for a long time. I have a hard time swallowing pills. I don't take vitamins because they are hard to swallow. I have even tried cutting them in half but then you have those jagged edges that may scrap the back of your throat. Ouch.

Well, I will be checking back in soon to let you know if I am losing weight. I am going to take a picture of myself for before and after shots but I'm not putting them on here until I lose some of the weight that I hate.